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Fic ~ Some Things Simply Never Change
Oh lookie ~ 6_6
It’s Friday, which means it time for Chapter 06 of Spiral! Yay! This is it guys… it’s the beginning of the second half of the story and things are about to kick into overdrive! The drama, oh the drama!
Title: Spiral (Chapter 06 ~ Reminiscent)
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Romance/Angst
Pairing: Sakurai/Aiba
Word Count: 3,000
Type: Multi-Chapter/Series
Summary: Aiba reminds us never to drink and drive!
Prologue - Ouroborus - HERE
Chapter 01 - Parallels - HERE
Chapter 02 - Tempest - HERE
Chapter 03 - Philos - HERE
Chpater 04 - Sacrosanct - HERE
Chapter 05 - Discourse - HERE
Disclaimer: I don’t own Arashi. I’m just using them to entertain myself.
Spiral
Chapter 06 ~ Reminiscent
It had been difficult at first, Aiba reflected, to sit down and enjoy a meal with the man who broke his heart. It was made harder by the presence of his kindly boss and the need to conceal his feelings. And all the worse by the fact that Sho looked so utterly good and so obviously eager to be as far away from Aiba as possible. Shimura Ken had not seen the queasy cast to Sakurai’s features as the pair sat down, but Masaki had.
The tall man was aware that he was not looking at his best; he was covered with sweat and grime from the golf course, after all. But seeing that the sight of him was enough to make the rapper sick was a bitter feeling. Especially when he recalled the immaculately attired young woman that Sakurai was apparently dating.
As time passed, however, with Shimura Ken leading the conversation and just enough alcohol to loosen the knots in his stomach, Aiba was able to start enjoying himself. When the elderly host asked about their younger days, the two Idols reminisced together naturally. The young man could almost feel their friendship reasserting itself as they discussed late night bicycle rides and angry claimants.
Slowly, it was beginning to feel like things were normal between them.
Masaki listened happily as Sakurai related an episode that had occurred backstage at one of their previous concerts. “…Nino thought it would be funny to ‘contribute’ to Ohno-kun’s artwork. So, he drew an S and an N on the picture, with a heart in between.”
The unpretentious celebrity laughed heartily. “How did Ohno-kun react?” He asked.
“He didn’t.” Aiba supplied, picking up the narrative. “When Leader came back and saw it, he just sat down and kept drawing. He made it part of the design.”
Sho, both elbows on the table, leaned towards the younger man as he spoke. “He did end up offering the picture to ‘Kazu-chan’ when he was done, though, remember?”
“Oh yeah…” Aiba giggled. “Nino-chan said he didn’t want it.”
“Actually,” Sakurai corrected him, his cheeks dimpled in mirth. “He told him not to be so creepy!”
All three men guffawed over this before the bespectacled host excused himself to use the facilities. Finding they were alone, Aiba worried that their newly rekindled camaraderie would quickly extinguish. The tall Idol, however, was determined not to let that happen.
He still desperately wanted to be with the gentle rapper, but he knew he had to put that aside now. If Sakurai did not love him, at least he did not seem to hate him either. Aiba’s love for the caster had grown from their friendship; if he could not have the former returned in kind, then he would treasure the latter all the more.
“I wonder what happened with that drawing?” He murmured, carefully staying on topic to avoid being awkward.
It seemed to work; Sho was at ease as he replied. “Oh, that’s right! You left before it ended.”
“How did it end?”
Wearing a boyish grin that creased the corners of his eyes attractively, Sakurai explained. “He changed to N to an M and gave it to Matsujun instead.”
“Uwah…” Masaki chortled. “I bet Nino-chan wasn’t very happy about that.”
“Well, I can’t say for sure…” The intelligent young man confessed with a smile. “But I don’t think I’ve seen Nino tamper with any of Leaders work since.”
“Ah- You’re right!” He exclaimed happily. “You know…” He continued on a conspiratorial note. “Sometimes, I wonder about those two….”
He had meant the remark to be in jest, but Sho seemed to misunderstand. In an instant his smile slipped and his whole demeanour became grave. “Aiba-chan…”
Alarmed, the lithe man interrupted before the rapper could say more. “No! Wait Sho-chan.” He pleaded evenly. “Before you say anything, let me speak first, OK?”
Sakurai hesitated. “But-”
“Please, Sho-chan!?” He begged. He pressed the palms of his hands together and held them before him beseechingly. When Sakurai relented and agreed to listen, Aiba breathed a sigh of relief. He took a moment to collect his thoughts and then began in a quiet voice. “Today… today – I didn’t think it was possible, but – I had fun. I am having fun. I think… I think I had forgotten what it was like; being like this. Sho-chan….” Leaning towards the older man, Aiba’s next words were an entreating whisper. “Can’t we just go back?”
“Eh!?” Sho’s eyes snapped wide and he recoiled. He opened his mouth to respond, but Masaki hurried on.
“I just want to go back to the way things were.” He insisted bitterly. “I like being your friend, Sho-chan. I like hanging out with you and doing stupid stuff that nobody else cares about. Can’t we go back to before any of this started? Before you… well, can’t we forget about all that and just be regular friends again? Before everything got complicated and weird and…wrong? I just want us to be normal.” He stressed. “That’s all I want.”
“…That’s all?” Sakurai asked slowly.
“That’s all.” Aiba assured him. And while he knew it was not all he wanted, he also knew it was all he could hope to get.
It was at that moment that their elderly host returned to the table. “What’s all?” He asked cheerfully, having overheard Masaki’s final statement.
“Uh, nothing!” The youngest man lied, hastily picking up his water glass and taking a long pull to avoid more uncomfortable questions. He was concerned that Sakurai had not been able to respond to his request and feared that the caster never would.
He was surprised, however, when Sakurai turned to address the older man. “It was nothing really.” He replied smoothly. “Except that…. Well, have you ever noticed how impossible it is to actually say no to Aiba-chan?”
His warm-hearted boss laughingly agreed; his curiosity satisfied. Yet Aiba found himself hiding a grimace behind his glass. He thought that if that were true, he would not have had to settle for just Sakurai’s friendship in the first place. If Sho really could not deny Masaki anything, why had he refused the one thing Aiba wanted most in the world: Sakurai himself?
Still, Aiba was tired of feeling sorry for himself. He had decided to focus on making sure their friendship really did survive. It would not really be that different from when they were dating, he told himself. Except the level of intimacy they shared. Oh, but he missed that.
Quickly the trio settled back into their easy manner and were soon laughing again. Shimura regaled his younger audience with stories about the notable people he had encountered in his career. He talked about his admiration for nature and jokingly complimented Sakurai’s golf prowess as seen on VS Arashi.
Finally, as lunch became late afternoon, the party wound down. While the generous host left to settle the bill, Sakurai Sho made a much needed trip to the bathroom. Having relieved himself of his most pressing need, he lingered at the sink. Splashing cool water against his alcohol flushed cheeks; he regarded himself in the mirror above the basin.
He had to admit that he had enjoyed Aiba’s company. Not because it had felt like old times, but because it had felt like they were still together. Sakurai cared deeply about the winsome young man and it had been good to share in his breathy laughter again. As with when they were dating, Sho had delighted in his smiles and infectious enthusiasm. It had felt no different from two weeks previous, when they had joined a group of mutual friends for dinner.
Taking a deep breath, Sakurai steeled himself and emerged from the toilet. He spotted Masaki stood just outside the entrance with his back to the glass. Shimura Ken was nowhere in sight and Sho hurried to join the younger man. As he approached he looked around for the missing member of their party. “Hey, where-?”
“Gone.” Aiba answered before the caster could even finish his question. “He got a call and had to leave.”
“Oh, I see. You didn’t have to wait.” Sakurai told the man, feeling guilty.
Masaki sniffed indignantly. “I’m not Leader, Sho-chan; even if the bill is paid in full. Besides…” He added with a mischievous grin, patting the bulky gold bag at his side. “Enchou had to leave in a hurry and he collected me this morning. I need a ride.”
Sakurai sighed. “I only came out for a walk, Aiba-chan.” He explained.
“Yeah, so?” The man shrugged. “You didn’t walk all the way from your house, did you? Where did you park?”
The rapper shook his head. Sometimes, he thought, Masaki knew him entirely too well. “The car is three blocks away.” He confessed ruefully.
“Thr-? Wow~!” Aiba exaggerated his reaction. “You really didn’t walk far, did you?” He teased.
“Oi!”
“Well you didn’t!” The taller man pointed out with a grin. “It’s only three blocks, right?”
Sho returned his smile sheepishly. “I got hungry.” He defended himself.
“Whatever. Just give me your car keys.”
“What? Why should I?”
“Because…” Aiba responded with mock disdain. “You drank way too much and I don’t want us both to get killed.”
“You drank too.” The older man argued even as he dug his keys from his pocket and handed them other.
“I nursed the same beer for four hours and drank water in between.”
“Isn’t that a little extreme?” Sho enquired, referring to Masaki’s level of caution.
“After what happened the first time I went drinking with Shimura-san? No. Now, kindly stop wasting time and let’s go. We’ve got a whole three blocks to walk, after all, and no golf caddy in sight….”
Getting the hint as Aiba began marching purposefully away; Sakurai hefted the bag over his shoulder and followed after him.
For the news caster, it felt entirely too natural when the car pulled up at Aiba’s building. He had done this some thing many times as Masaki’s friend and countless more as his lover. Yet despite his promise to revert back to being just friends, Sho could not help but recall the last time Aiba had driven him to his home.
It was hard to believe that it had been just over a week ago. There were times when it felt like an eternity had passed. And there were times –like now– when it hardly felt like they had broken up at all, and the past week had just been one long nightmare.
With Sakurai still toting Aiba’s sports gear, the taller man preceded him and opened the front door. Dumping the heavy bag just inside the entrance alongside Masaki’s shoes, Sho found himself watching the younger man. Padding barefoot into his apartment he casually tossed two sets of keys onto the counter and headed for the kitchen.
“Do you want some water?” The young man called out to him.
“Uh, no thanks.” Shaking himself out of his trance, the rapper did not move from the entranceway. “I’ll just call myself a taxi and head home.”
“Don’t be stupid.” Aiba chided him from the kitchen and thankfully, out of sight. “If you just let me grab a quick shower and change, I’ll drive you home myself. You did carry my golf clubs for–” Coming back from the other room as he spoke, Aiba paused when he saw the older man loitering just inside his door.
The moment he had crossed the threshold into Aiba’s home, Sakurai knew he should not have come inside. The sight of the young man – relaxed and at ease in his own home – conjured memories that were as painful as they were potent. This had always been the one place where the physical aspects of their relationship could be expressed. To the outside world they had always been friends. From the day they began dating, it was only here that they had ever truly been lovers.
“Sho-chan, don’t just stand there.” The grateful young man approached him as if he intended to physically pull him from the spot to which he had rooted himself.
“No.” Sakurai shook his head as if to ward the other man off. “I really think I should call a taxi.” For a second, he glimpsed the look of consternation flash behind Masaki’s eyes as he balked, but Sho knew it was unavoidable. The rapper had spent the afternoon in the company of the younger man like nothing had changed about their relationship. Now, alone with the statuesque Idol, it was all too easy to imagine they were still together. The very idea of reaching out and reclaiming Aiba as his own was almost more temptation than he could bear.
He could still recall every nuance he had discovered of Aiba’s body. He could trace the outline of the mans prominent birthmark with his eyes closed. He remembered how good it felt to slide his hands through silky-soft hair while the man sighed against his mouth; content and pliant and willing. He knew every ridge and sinew, every mark and blemish that only added to the lithe mans perfection. Sakurai’s whole being burned with the memory of Aiba’s touch and the desire for more.
Oblivious to the chaos it caused with Sho’s self-control, Aiba sauntered over to stand mere inches from him. “Well, if you’re in that much of a hurry…” He sighed with a tolerant smile. “I can forget the shower and take you now.” He suggested.
He was too close. Sakurai screwed his eyes shut and pinched the bridge of his nose trying to fight the sudden fire in his veins. Muscles tense and his breath rasping unsteadily through gritted teeth, the caster struggled to hold still. Aiba’s proximity meant that Sho could smell the faint musk of his skin; could feel the heat of his body emanating between them. “…Masaki…” His voce was a strangled whisper. Finally, he dared to open his eyes and look up at the taller man.
Sakurai could not help himself; he drank in the sight of the younger man. Aiba’s lightened, beautifully styled hair was mussed fetchingly from the long day. His pale, flawless face shone under the light from the windows. His dark eyes gazed back intently; orbs of lacquered mahogany that pierced straight to the rapper chest. Masaki’s wide, perfectly formed mouth was pulled into a slight expectant pout as he waited curiously for Sakurai to finish his sentence.
“What’s the matter?” He asked gently when the older man had remained silent and staring. “Relax, Sho-chan.” Aiba smiled benignly. “I’ll just throw on a different t-shirt and we can go.” In one casual, fluid motion, the lithe man fisted the hem of his t-shirt in his hands and pulled the fabric up over his head.
It was too much for the overwrought caster. It was all too much. At the very moment Aiba had lifted his shirt to reveal his torso, Sakurai’s control snapped. With his arms above his head and trapped at the elbow in a tangle of fabric, Masaki had no defence against the older man. Sho seized upon the unsuspecting man pinned him to the wall. He pressed close, using his weight to keep the taller man in place as he reached up to claim Aiba’s mouth with his own.
He held the arms of the helpless man above him and swallowed Masaki’s shocked sounds of protest. As his mouth moved roughly over Aiba’s, hot and crushing and reckless, the rapper took want he wanted. It was not a kiss; there was no soft give-and-take, no loving reciprocation. Like a thief he simply seized all that he dared. He plundered the wet heat of Aiba’s mouth; he stole the very breath from his lungs. He feasted at his lips like a man dying of starvation and revelled in the familiar taste.
With the pressure of his arms he forced Aiba lower, to bend slightly at the knee. Urgently, Sakurai pushed one leg between them and slotted their hips together. Grinding against the younger man he growled low, appreciatively. When Sho released Masaki’s arms to slide his hands over the expanse of bare skin before him, Aiba made no move to lower them or push him away. With the t-shirt binding his limbs and the sculpted man pressing his back to the wall, struggling would have been futile anyway.
Sakurai moved to caress the side of Aiba’s neck; he caused the other man to tip his head back using the pressure of his fingers. With swollen, hungry lips, Sho trailed a path along the taut sinew of that exposed throat. He nipped and suckled at the delicate skin before moving in to nuzzle desperately at the dip created by the mans raised shoulder.
Distantly the caster could hear the pleading whimpers of the younger man, but he ignored everything but his own desire. He was completely consumed by the need for the tall man, and lost to reason. Caught up in a tide of lust and desperate to keep himself from drowning, he clung to Aiba like a man seeking salvation. It was not until he felt something warm and wet fall against his skin from above, that Sho could pull himself away.
Seeing the innocent man, immobile and gazing at him with tears in his eyes, brought the older man back to his senses with a crash. Realising what he had done – what he had been about to do – Sakurai recoiled in shame. He had never been so disgusted with himself. Filled with self-loathing, he turned away from the trembling man quickly. He could not bear to look at the younger man.
He had to get out. He had to escape; he could no longer trust himself to be with the other man. As he blindly reached for the door, he tried to apologise for his actions. “I’m sorry…” He choked out. The anger he felt for himself added a hard edge to his voice. “I-I… I won’t love you!” With that, he fled, leaving Masaki to sink slowly, silently to the floor.
To be continued…
Chapter 07 HERE
___________________________
OMFG!? I am EVIL!!!? >.<
Don’t kill me guys, please? If you promise to keep me alive, I promise to make it worth your while….
Next update on: Tuesday 25th August. If you want to keep track of this story and its progress, check out my post [HERE] I’ll keep it updated with any new information.
Comments, criticisms, opinions and ideas are all welcome! ♥
no subject
Now is the beginning of the end...!
*EVIL CACKLE*
no subject
and now ur reli starting to scare me oO
i hope it wont be too much for my heart to handlexDDDno subject
If it makes you feel any better, I'll give you some information on chapter 07. you know how they only really need to start talking properly to fix their current mess? Well~ chapter 07 is all talk.
no subject
arigatou. =)
since jun and nino and ohno think so too ne. =)